Monday, January 28, 2008

And the first nominees for the 2008 Darwinian Award goes to...

...this group of total fools!!! I like the concept fellas but engineers you are not. I'm surprised someone else in the pool is not screwing with a potato gun or something. At last, the Midwest is getting a brief yet rewarding reprieve from the absolutely frigid temperatures we had for nearly a solid four-week spell. I headed out of my apartment earlier today and was totally sold upon my first complete inhalation of warmer air that I should go out and purchase a hot tub. (I'm not going too but the thought did bring a smile to my face.)

It is nice to see some melt off of the snow and a glimpse at the muddy ground beneath. All the mud makes me want to go riding, and I am eager to do some experimentation on my shock upgrades. But that will happen later on. For now I will allow my lunch to digest and share some funny snippets I picked up over the past few weeks that didn't seem to make sense in light of the reviews I have been writing lately.

This cracked me up the other week when I stumbled upon it. How we have come full circle amazes me. What also amazes me is how a little bump in the daytime temperatures seems to have an affect on all the creatures out and about (including us). I see the Red Squirrels are out chasing each other around. The males of course trying to take the ol' skin boat to tuna town. Even some male birds are chasing around trying to convince the girls to sample their special ingredient. It's a bit premature for Spring time frolicking but what the hell. Like Lt. Col. Jack Slade once said, "When in doubt, fuck."

And believe me that's indeed what the little buggers will do. I actually don't mind squirrels in general. Yeah, they screw with you when driving your car sometimes. Should I cross? Shouldn't I cross? What's across there? Do I wanna find out? Is that a car coming? Hold still! I'm going back! Shit, that car's coming fast. Screw it, I'm crossing!!! I think their appeal lies in the fact that they have big eyes, can sit up, have little hands and seem to be constantly thinking. I like watching squirrels eat. They'll be sitting there consuming an acorn or something like a chipper shredder consumes a tree branch and then all of a sudden cock their heads and freeze as though something just dawned on them. One minute they're like, juggle-juggle, chew-chew-chew, this acorn is the bomb, juggle-juggle, chew-chew-chew, fuckin' A for acorns, chew-chew and all is right with the world. Then they stop and think, "Did I leave the oven on?" And you can tell they're thinking really hard cause they are frozen, man. Then they finally realize, "Of course not, I'm a fucking squirrel!" Chew-chew-chew, juggle-juggle.

Warmer weather has other, how shall we say, advantages? Yes, advantages definitely. First thing that's immediately apparent is less clothing. While I love Fall for the fact that I can finally start wearing sweaters again, I equally love spring for the fact that sweaters can start coming off. When I was in college, buddies and I used to refer to Spring as "bare midriff" season as women's midriff's would come out of hibernation. True, bare midriffs are still a ways away but as I always say, something that brings a smile to your face is worth thinking about a time or two. A head in the clouds is fine as long as you have two feet on the ground. (On a side note: The above pic has got to be one of my favorite vintage posters I've seen to date. I love the caption most of all. Yep, don't come a knocking when this trailer is a rocking! lol)

Cheers to head in the clouds, bare midriffs, vintage posters and Spring!


0 talkin' trash: